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Hold on for

Labels: Studies

Oh my god I need someone to chat with on MSN now.
This frustration is killing me. :S

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12.31am: I'm so sleepy now. I wonder has anyone died because of lack of sleep? I've done nothing before the evening other than listening to songs and scribbling. How was I supposed to do any of my homework in a bad mood? So yeah. Have to stay up till midnight to do a bit of work. I'm sure that I won't even compete any of the tasks but I'll try do fill in some of the bits. Why on earth do we students have so much coursework due in the last week of school! Isn't the last week of school supposed to be relaxing and fun?

Oh, I really don't want Year 10 to end. the next Year will just be tough, more coursework of endless words and mocks. Right now I want to watch movies such as Transformers and Confessions of a Shopaholic (omg that's aired so long ago but I haven't got any chances to watch it!) Not to forget the 4 TVB dramas awaiting me. What to do, I'll have to wait for another dreadful week for those enjoyments. :S

Labels: Random

I was literally screaming in astonishment in front of my computer screen after looking at Raymond Lam's golden hair. For a minute I thought it was super cool to have golden hair and I would like to dye mine like his hohoho! After looking at it for several times later, I still prefer the hair colour black, or brunette. Undeniable, his new look was fresh to me still.

His 3rd album 'Let's Get Wet' was released on the 15th June and I already have all those songs stored in my computer! :) I haven't been checking his news lately, and the feeling of seeing him on the internet after so long was indescribable. My sister was kind of speechless seeing how crazy I was yesterday, logging on to so many websites at a time: youtube, e-news, tvb, forums etc. - you name it!

At night I switched on the channel TVB8 and waited for the whole hour for his news. In the end there was nothing about him but quite a long section about this Mainland actor called 林一峰. Whenever that guy's name was mentioned I would turn my gaze from facing the laptop to the TV screen. My dad was wondering why would I be interested to know about that guy from China (who is obviously not that good-looking), he was laughing so hard after I told him I heard the wrong name and assumed him to be Lam Fung. :S

I actually wanted to check the MTV channel, but my dad switched it to some sports channel. So yeah, didn't get to see him on TVon that day -but I'm sure the chance will come since (as you know) I'm such a determined fan LOL.

Before ending this post, I'd like to share my favourite picture of his first concert:


I think he looks great in that picture, although he did remind me a bit about magicians. It's a lil disappointing that Kelly Yap thinks the suit is just weird and he looks ugly. Oh well oh well. Nobody can dampen my high spirits towards him. (:

Labels: Obsessions

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2007 and the first half of 2008 are (and will always be) the most precious years to me. Whenever I recall of those interesting happenings that I had been through in those two years, several people will just pop into my mind, and one of them is Laura Tan. (:

Today's her birthday yet I'm unable to celebrate it with her, nor to buy any gifts for her. Anyway, HAPPY SWEET 16 LAURA TAN JIA JIA, the girl who's exactly 5 months older than me and has the same name as my sister (bahahah)!

• Laura's one of the first few friends I got to know when I first went into 1 Amanah in 2006.
• She's the friend who can put up with me no matter how annoying I seemed to be. As far as I can remember, we never argue or quarrel over any topics. Even if we did so, she must be one one being tolerant to fulfill my requests.
• One remarkable thing that I can think of right now is that she NEVER ever complained when I kept on bugging her with my Raymond Lam craze. Never. How lovely can she be right, lol.
• Oh, she's also my partner in Pandu Puteri (along with Yip Kei, Jie Yi and Jie Yinn) who kept me accompanied for most of the time during school activities. Now when I think of it, it's actually fun marching together under the blazing sun.
• In Form 1, we used to dislike the same teacher and criticised about her all day long. Once during her lesson, she heard our criticism about her and insisted us to repeat our words. As an obedient student, I could tell that Laura was quite scared of getting herself into troubles. We just ended up laughing along with other friends after the teacher left hahah. *I bet Laura knows which teacher I'm referring if she's reading this. Well, if she doesn't really get it, here's the hint: That teacher's the one who couldn't remember my name after teaching me for the whole year and kept on referring me as 'the blue-eyes girl', ugh.
• Laura's one of the most obedient students, ranking after Sok Kuan lol. I used to borrow her English essays once or twice in Form 3 as reference when I had to rush through my homework.
• She's also so good at participating in plays for oral exams. Once, someone joked that her mother is a movie director or something, and I really believed in that haha!
  
• Hey, here's a funny point that I can think of! A few other friends and I loved teasing her when there's this guy (whose nickname's Big Head) had a crush on her. Now I'm wondering whether that guy's in the same class as her this year. ;P
• Laura's a huge fan of David Archuleta (it's exactly like how I'm obsessed with Raymond Lam as so you know..). When I was with Zhen Ni and Sarah in Sunway Pyramid someday in April, she was somewhere outside the mall supporting for Archie lol. I think you'd probably guess that fact right - it was the day which David Archuleta visited KL. :D
  

Have a fab birthday Laura, and I wish you the best in everything you do. Enjoy school life to the max and hopefully you get to meet more of David Archuleta. Keep me posted on whatever interesting that's happening in Seafield (which I'm missing out currently), alright? :)

Labels: Buddies, Celebrations

June 14th 2009, Sunday.
My family went to PIM on Saturday for dinner and we just decided to buy that Tiramisu cake for celebrating dad's first anniversary in Jakarta (wth?) and that my exams were over. Nah those were reasons we made up after eating the cake. The actual fact was that there was discount for buying that piece of cake lol. Haha I have such typical Asian family who never says no to promotions and discounts. :P By just buying a simple cake we're contributing to the cashflow in the market - sorry man, Economics was my last test paper (if you get what I mean).

As I said before, my exams have officially, finally ended on last Friday. I was so much relaxed after that. Right after I reached home I just logged on Facebook and MSN and whatever forums and blogs that I could think of in my head. Yes, I stayed in front of the computer screen for many hours straight before I even bathed. How crazy can that be right! I told you I'm a lifeless Internet addict. ;)

Overall, most of the subjects were fine, I made so many guesses just to fill in the blanks for most of the papers and was rushing for English and Geography papers. Maths was an exception though, it's so-damned-freaking-incredibly-extremely hard (sorry, please bear with me for those itensifiers). Ugh I'm failing that for sure since I only did about half of the questions, now I'm hoping to get more than 30%. :(

There was this 'special' happening during Geography exam. When I first got that paper, I got a lil panicked after looking at the great amount of questions and page numbers. I ended up repeating similar answers for the first 2 questions as I didn't read the first one properly. Not wanting to waste time erasing those long answers, I raised my hand and asked the invigilator whether there's an extra question paper for me to redo everything. He didn't really get what I mean since I never do a good job expressing myself well in words. Instead of fulfilling my requests, he gave me a blank piece of lined-paper for working. :O In the end I just had to ignore the repeated answers as there was not enough time. The paper lasted for 2 hours and I was the last one who walked out of the hall. Guess what comments did I get from the teacher? "Well done, you managed to finish on time!" haha. How supportive she is to all the students. :]

The other subjects went pretty smoothly I guess, and Maths was so horrible that I don't want to think of it now. Let's just skip through the exam topic then.

I have so many plans after exams actually! Those would include catching up with about 6 movies that I missed (bought those DVDs since ages but just kept them aside), watching 3 old TVB dramas, download tons of songs, edit hundreds of pictures, and not to forget reading reviews of mobile phones on the net! I'm ready to ditch my old phone which has accompanied me for more than 3 years and get a new one, but still can't make a decision of which to buy. There's always something going into my way, like some have price levels that are way too high, the styles of a few don't suit my taste, and most of the decent-looking ones can't be used to access Wi-fi. Gosh why am I so indecisive! I'll have to decide on that before late-July! :O

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15th June 2009, Monday
The first 3 papers were back: Music, Chemistry and English. All the teachers are so efficient that I believe within days, the full results will be in the students' hands. Oh well, A's and B's are satisfying for those 3 papers, but I could have done a better job in English. :S Looking at the bright side, there're always improvements in the next year.

& I'm right here waiting for the chance,
no matter how bleak and dim things turn out to be;

Geez here's a random fact about that photo: I look like a zombie who's listening to some alien musics under the artificial light! :P Maybe I should like, 'cartoonise' myself and see how much alike I am to an alien, or a zombie - I can't even clearly differentiate their looks. :) (:

Labels: Camwhore Sessions, Celebrations, Studies

Shit, the last thing I want before my exams is to be sick.

I'm like, super lazy to attend school for the Country Fair. It just reminds me of the last Carnival Day in Seafield. That was in 2006, I can still remember the Haunted House prepared by 5A and my sister was crying terribly in it. Uh. :/ Oh I even helped to sell 'cucuk' with Pn Norzaina at the stall of 1 Amanah haha. I can't really remember that much about that day anymore, all I know is that the Country Fair tomorrow wouldn't be the same. :(

I'm totally, hopelessly addicted to the internet, minimum 2 to 3 hours in a day are spent in front of the computer screen. And I have homesick man, how to study in such conditions! Whenever I flip through the pages of my book, I'll naturally think about my friends who're having their holidays and I will not be bothered to study. Fine that's not called homesick, maybe it should be called schoolsick or whatsoever. Pfft, now I'm off to watch television!
It's always like that: whenever something good happens, another terrible thing will be lying ahead. Whenever I just start to gain some confidence and self-esteem, some unexpected incidents will just ruin everything. Yesterday was the greatest day of the week; today everything just went down the drain.

Holding back the tears have been always the hardest part for me. I guess I should feel lucky that I didn't break down in school today. That's some kind of accomplishment to me. Seriously, I'm so vulnerable that sometimes I think my tears will eventually pale my iris colourless. That's such a silly thought to you I might say, but I remember reading that statement somewhere in a book - I think that's why the thought just came to me that naturally.

It's unbelievable that I could still fake a smile in front of the public - even when practically everything's gone wrong; even when I felt helpless deep inside and I needed someone to spill everything out. I do know that I've friends who are always there for me, but they would hardly understand the problem that I'm facing. Moreover, it's been my problem since forever that I suck at expressing my thoughts in verbal words.

As you see, Friday is always not my day, not when the 3 hardest subjects are arranged together after one another. Japanese lesson after lunch was the only thing I really enjoyed, it just had the power to calm myself down. Watching short funny video clips in class did help, it diverted my mind from most of the problems. Even the teacher played the role of keeping everyone entertained and not to fall asleep. He understands how sleepy we feel during the last period. So yeah, I was kind of cheered up by the end of day.

Now I'm, again, starting to worry about Monday next week. Hopefully nobody gets annoyed over the serious shit I've done. How I wish that I can take critism with an open mind, without caring much of what the others think of me. I wonder why am I different from everyone else sometimes.

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The exams (which everyone takes it seriously since weeks ago) are coming in a week's time, yet I already see no hope in certain subjects, especially complusory subjects like Maths. I really need to be motivated right now to start studying for serious. But I keep on getting distracted by non-important things like Facebook or my camera or my phone or even a blank piece of paper, oh gosh. I'm in a holiday mood right now, which is so terrible. It's as if I were still in Seafield and that I've just finished my tests with the other friends.

My mind needs adjustment. God bless me.

Labels: Emotional, Studies

JIAWEN with the surname TEO.
" I'll respond as long as you pronounce it as something similar to Cheah Wern or Gee-ya Van. "

• 18th November 1993
• Malaysian Chinese who is currently staying in Jakarta, Indonesia. :(
• Loves in her life include food, music, graphic design and photography.
• The girl sucks badly in sports, public speaking and drama.
• She's better at expressing herself in doodles and scribbles rather than speaking.
• Indecisive at most of the time and often regret over her choices.
• She understands English, Mandarin, Cantonese, Malay and is learning the basics of Japanese and Indonesian. :)

Feel free to e-mail me @ teojiawen@gmail.com

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